nineveh_uk: Illustration that looks like Harriet Vane (Harriet)
The silver lining of having a cold is that I have finally managed to start watching this series of Doctor Who (haven't seen the last two episodes, no spoilers please). I'm enjoying it quite a lot, but I did spend the first episode imagining what it would be like to be the Head of Department in a department with the Doctor in it...


'We're supposed to have an agreement. I give you an office, a lecture slot, and an admittedly modest salary. In return, you teach what you like with no questions asked, and give me four REF-able articles. Four 4* REF-able outputs that I can actually submit, unlike the ones you emailed me last week.'

'What's wrong with them?'

'They're on medieval Armenian poetry and we're the philosophy department.'

'Where's your imagination? I'm sure you can find a use for them. They're very good articles.'

'I know , I had them read by someone who can actually read Armenian. She said that they were the best work she'd seen in her career, and incidentally wherever did you find that new manuscript?

'I know that you don't like the REF, Doctor. Most of your colleagues don't like it either. As the person who has to deal with everybody else not liking it, I inevitably hate it. But until you give me four articles in a subject relevant to an existing University department or, if you prefer, invent time travel and stop it happening in the first place, I shall continue to nag you to ensure that you adhere to the terms of our agreement. Here's a list of departments. Four outputs, or time travel, Doctor, it's up to you.'

[worp worp]

'Of course we can add medieval Armenian poetry to the lecture list next year. Now if you could just remember that I will need your entry for the Great University Bake-Off Biscuit Challenge by Friday that would be great.'


Meanwhile in the real-life department of Be Careful What You Wish For Studies, this gem from the Wikipedia article on the RAE:

The committee received submissions of research statements from 37 subject areas ("cost centres") within Universities, along with five selected research outputs.


A subsequent research assessment was conducted in 1989 under the name "research selectivity exercise" by the Universities Funding Council. Responding to the complaint of the Universities that they weren't allowed submit their "full strength," Swinnerton-Dyer allowed the submission of two research outputs per every member of staff.

And so the madness began.
nineveh_uk: Illustration that looks like Harriet Vane (Harriet)
Hair! Not bald! Pity, baldness is cool. Long hair! Lots of hair, that's good. Different, but good. Face all there, lots of bones, nice jaw. No beard, but you can't have everything. Hands! Bit small, actually, might wear gloves. Oh, etheric beam locators! That's useful. Ah. Not in fact etheric beam locators, breasts. Haven't had those in a while, and not for very long then. You were running through regenerations rather fast, and now you think of it you never met him in that body. Oh, this could be fun. Need a new outfit, of course, and perhaps the name. Disguise it a bit, so it takes him time to guess. If the Doctor has a fault - what are you saying, he has hundreds of them - but fairly close to the top of the list is a lack of imagination when it comes to what his friends might be thinking.

Oh, so many opportunities. So much fun.

Doctor Who

Oct. 1st, 2011 07:57 pm
nineveh_uk: Illustration that looks like Harriet Vane (Harriet)
How, HOW, did that go completely unguessed?

Also, people under the rain band, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

Doctor Who

Jun. 4th, 2011 09:06 pm
nineveh_uk: Cover illustration for "Strong Poison" in pulp fiction style with vampish Harriet. (Strong Poison)
If x is z, does that mean y?

spoilers )

That really was a fun episode. I have new favourite character and two new favourite lines (only one spoken).
nineveh_uk: Picture of hollyhocks in bloom. Caption "WTF hollyhocks!" (hollyhocks)
Cut for spoiler )

Also, I think I need to do a post about the BBC’s editorial guidelines and how they relate to children’s programming, general programming, and the watershed, for [community profile] doctorwho.


nineveh_uk: Picture of a wild rabbit with text "I hope your rabbit dies" (Default)

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