nineveh_uk: Illustration that looks like Harriet Vane (Default)
[personal profile] nineveh_uk
There’s a poetry meme. And damn it, but I am going to post.

Hall and Knight

I first read and memorised this poem aged about eight. It was my first introduction to algebra, and it is possible that I liked the poem so much because of that - in those days, algebra possessed a sort of glamour that came, perhaps, from its association with Older Children and Big School. Actual understanding was not required. It was about twenty years later that I discovered that Hall and Knight were real people who tormented school children with their infamous work Elementary Algebra. I've since acquired a copy; it ain't that elementary, Watson.

The poem is also significant to me for another reason. It was my introduction to subtext and slash. There was just something about these house-sharing, slyly winking Victorian gentlemen that made me think Hmm...

It's by E.V. Rieu, more famous as the Penguin Classics translator of Homer, but author of some really rather charming (in the best way) children's poetry.

Hall and Knight

or 'z + b + x = y + b + z'


When he was young his cousins used to say of Mr Knight:
'This boy will write an algebra - or looks as if he might.'
And sure enough, when Mr Knight had grown to be a man,
He purchased pen and paper and an inkpot, and began.

But he very soon discovered that he couldn't write at all,
And his heart was filled with yearnings for a certain Mr Hall;
Till, after many years of doubt, he sent his friend a card:
'Have tried to write an Algebra, but find it very hard.'

Now Mr Hall himself had tried to write a book for schools,
But suffered from a handicap: he didn't know the rules.
So when he heard from Mr Knight and understood his gist,
He answered him by telegram: 'Delighted to assist.'

So Mr Hall and Mr Knight they took a house together,
And they worked away at algebra in any kind of weather,
Determined not to give up until they had evolved
A problem so constructed that it never could be solved.

'How hard it is', said Mr Knight, 'to hide the fact from youth
That x and y are equal: it is such an obvious truth!'
'It is', said Mr Hall, 'but if we gave a b to each,
We'd put the problem well beyond our little victims' reach.

'Or are you anxious, Mr Knight, lest any boy should see
The utter superfluity of this repeated b?'
'I scarcely fear it', he replied, and scratched this grizzled head,
'But perhaps it would be safer if to b we added z.'

'A brilliant stroke!', said Hall, and added z to either side;
Then looked at his accomplice with a flush of happy pride.
And Knight, he winked at Hall (a very pardonable lapse).
And they printed off the Algebra and sold it to the chaps.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-09-27 03:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolorous-ett.livejournal.com
Like you, I saw this when very young, though I never thought to get it off by heart - and like you, just liked the sound of this. Though I learn one of his (her?) others, if (as I think is the case) he (or she) wrote the one that starts something like

Full many a magic island lies
Within the seas of coral,
But only Funafuti wields
A magic that is moral,
There is no island in the west
Or in the Spanish main
That boasts a flora so unique,
A flora so urbane...


And goes on to detail how a shipful of pirates landed and suddenly became very, very polite.

Possibly too much information?

Can't see the slashiness myself - but then, I never can.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-09-28 04:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nineveh-uk.livejournal.com
Pirates on Funafuti! Another Rieu classic (he was a he), though I never learned that one by heart (somehow I found the influential island a little unnerving). Hmm, d’you think we had the same poetry book? I was rather fond of “The Flattered Flying Fish”
Said the shark to the flying fish over the phone
Will you join me tonight, I am dining alone”

(no subject)

Date: 2005-09-28 05:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolorous-ett.livejournal.com
Yes! That's the one!

Said the shark to the flying fish over the phone
Will you join me tonight, I am dining alone”


With unfortunate - but predictable - results.

Was it something like "A Quartet of Poets"? A cream job, with a red border?

(no subject)

Date: 2005-09-29 03:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nineveh-uk.livejournal.com
Yep, same book. I was also fond of the poems about tortoises with very long titles (the poems, not the tortoises).

(no subject)

Date: 2005-09-29 04:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolorous-ett.livejournal.com
I loved that book as a kid! I just hope that I didn't throw it out as a teenager...

yes, come in and get wet!

Date: 2005-09-28 11:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolabellae.livejournal.com
Marvellous. And I never knew Rieu wrote children's poetry, so thank you very much for sharing this. Will have to show it to my dad the mathematician, as it'll be his equivalent to my well-loved [i]Liddell and Scott: On the Completion of their Lexicon{/i}by Thomas Hardy.

http://studentweb.hunter.cuny.edu/~murrayj/humor/lsj.html (though I'm afraid whoever has put the poem on the web hasn't made sure the Greek fonts are showing properly and I don't know how to get them on Livejournal. Greek fonts and computers don't get on well in general, and daily prove a curse to classicists...)

My favourite Victorian gentlemen twosome are Mortimer Lightwood and Eugene Lightwood in [i]Our Mutual Friend[/i]...

Re: splashing madly like a labrador

Date: 2005-09-28 04:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nineveh-uk.livejournal.com
I had never heard of Liddell and Scott - I have now! But Our Mutual Friend is Dickens and therby debarred from Nineveh's appreciation...

Re: splashing madly like a labrador

Date: 2005-09-29 11:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolabellae.livejournal.com
Liddell and Scott is a marvellous work. Weighs a tonne and costs a fortune, mind you.

Oh, I have a tremendous soft spot for Dickens. And was re-reading OMF recently with the filter of fanfic and was struck by how suitable it would be: huge cast list, loads of overmastering passions, both gay & lesbian subtext, disguise, High Society, a man called Mr Venus who works in a little shop putting skeletons together, even a hurt/comfort scene...
(OK, it also has a maudlin and Worthy sub-plot about a noble old woman who doesn't want to die 'on the Parish' and her angelic innocent great-great (or something) grandchild, but you can't have everything...)

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