Random DLS ponderings
Apr. 19th, 2010 11:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nineveh_ukLeafing through some DLS for dialogue help in the course of drafting some fic, a couple of paragraphs struck me.
The first is from the short stories. I don't read them much - they're not particularly good short stories - but I ought to read them more, as they have some interesting little passages in them. Like this one from The Unprincipled Affair of the Practical Joker.
[Peter is staying in a grand hotel somewhere-or-other that liners dock from Africa (Southampton?), and Mrs Ruyslaender has spotted his name on the register and, desperate, come to his suite at 11 pm to try to get his help on a case. Bunter admits her to the sitting room.]
The man stepped noiselessly to the bedroom door and passed, shutting it behind him. The lock, however, failed to catch, and Mrs Ruyslaender caught the conversation.
"Pardon me, my lord, a lady has called. She mentioned no appointment, so I considered it better to acquaint your lordship."
"Excellent discretion," said a voice. It had a slow, sarcastic intonation, which brought a painful flush to Mrs Ruyslaender's cheek. "I never make appointments. Do I know the lady?"
"No, my lord. But - hem - I know her by sight, my lord. It is Mrs Ruyslaender."
"Oh, the diamond merchant's wife. Well, find out tactfully what it's all about, and, unless it's urgent, ask her to call tomorrow."
The valet's remark was inaudible, but the reply was:
"Don't be coarse, Bunter."
*
I assume that Peter is still being sarcastic here, and not actually ticking Bunter off in the final sentence - it would be a bit much if he were, given that he started it. There are other passages of what Peter and Bunter and Peter and Parker talking about women/sex within the books, but I think that this is the most obviously blokish one.
*
Second, Busman's Honeymoon.
[Chapter 4, Bunter and Peter the morning after, not quite a page after Bunter's "I trust your lordship found everything satisfactory?"]
"Then buzz off and get breakfast before I get like the Duke of Wellington, nearly reduced to a skellington.... I say, Bunter."
"My lord?"
"I'm damned sorry you're having all this trouble."
"Don't mention it, my lord. So long as your lordship is satisfied - "
"Yes. All right, Bunter. Thanks."
He dropped his hand lightly on the servant's shoulder in what might have been a gesture of affection or dismissal as you chose to take it, and stood looking thoughtfully into the fireplace till his wife rejoined him.
*
All things considered, perhaps it's a good thing that the body turned up in a cellar and gave them all something to talk about...
Just spell it out for a moment. There's Bunter coming in, asking in code if Peter had a good night's not-sleep, and Peter giving a "you cannot seriously think I'm going to answer that" response and changing the subject. Then they waffle on about business (a bit awkwardly? A little excessively normal?) before Peter appears to feel guilty, calls Bunter back, apologises, ostensibly for the trouble (this the man who in the past has booked a holiday cottage with no indoor plumbing at all without remorse), Bunter brings up - something - again, gets an answer, and the final ambiguous gesture of reassurance/don't need you anymore, and Peter stares at the fireplace Bunter has just relaid mulling over - something - the options being presumably (1) yes, that was a highly satisfactory night, or (2) Oh God, is this about to be a bit difficult?
All of which I've thought before, and tended to assume that Peter is intending to be sympathetic if abstracted. What I haven't thought about before is the implication of Bunter potentially taking it seriously as a dismissal. It certainly makes Peter's laughing about the morning's Humorous Soot/Sink Incident an awful lot harsher from Bunter's POV, and adds greater force to his being off-kilter over the next few days and the absolute triumph when he beats Harriet to be the one wanted once again. No wonder the Duchess wonders how things are going after talking to him.
***
And yet people still think that Bunter fantasises about racehorses. Well, I suppose they have big noses and are famously well-endowed. (Do you think I'd get away on the Yahoo list with "Bunter has a dirty night out in the Denver stables" on the grounds that it if you don't accept anything at all is going on re. Peter then something must be going on re. Equus caballus?)
The first is from the short stories. I don't read them much - they're not particularly good short stories - but I ought to read them more, as they have some interesting little passages in them. Like this one from The Unprincipled Affair of the Practical Joker.
[Peter is staying in a grand hotel somewhere-or-other that liners dock from Africa (Southampton?), and Mrs Ruyslaender has spotted his name on the register and, desperate, come to his suite at 11 pm to try to get his help on a case. Bunter admits her to the sitting room.]
The man stepped noiselessly to the bedroom door and passed, shutting it behind him. The lock, however, failed to catch, and Mrs Ruyslaender caught the conversation.
"Pardon me, my lord, a lady has called. She mentioned no appointment, so I considered it better to acquaint your lordship."
"Excellent discretion," said a voice. It had a slow, sarcastic intonation, which brought a painful flush to Mrs Ruyslaender's cheek. "I never make appointments. Do I know the lady?"
"No, my lord. But - hem - I know her by sight, my lord. It is Mrs Ruyslaender."
"Oh, the diamond merchant's wife. Well, find out tactfully what it's all about, and, unless it's urgent, ask her to call tomorrow."
The valet's remark was inaudible, but the reply was:
"Don't be coarse, Bunter."
*
I assume that Peter is still being sarcastic here, and not actually ticking Bunter off in the final sentence - it would be a bit much if he were, given that he started it. There are other passages of what Peter and Bunter and Peter and Parker talking about women/sex within the books, but I think that this is the most obviously blokish one.
*
Second, Busman's Honeymoon.
[Chapter 4, Bunter and Peter the morning after, not quite a page after Bunter's "I trust your lordship found everything satisfactory?"]
"Then buzz off and get breakfast before I get like the Duke of Wellington, nearly reduced to a skellington.... I say, Bunter."
"My lord?"
"I'm damned sorry you're having all this trouble."
"Don't mention it, my lord. So long as your lordship is satisfied - "
"Yes. All right, Bunter. Thanks."
He dropped his hand lightly on the servant's shoulder in what might have been a gesture of affection or dismissal as you chose to take it, and stood looking thoughtfully into the fireplace till his wife rejoined him.
*
All things considered, perhaps it's a good thing that the body turned up in a cellar and gave them all something to talk about...
Just spell it out for a moment. There's Bunter coming in, asking in code if Peter had a good night's not-sleep, and Peter giving a "you cannot seriously think I'm going to answer that" response and changing the subject. Then they waffle on about business (a bit awkwardly? A little excessively normal?) before Peter appears to feel guilty, calls Bunter back, apologises, ostensibly for the trouble (this the man who in the past has booked a holiday cottage with no indoor plumbing at all without remorse), Bunter brings up - something - again, gets an answer, and the final ambiguous gesture of reassurance/don't need you anymore, and Peter stares at the fireplace Bunter has just relaid mulling over - something - the options being presumably (1) yes, that was a highly satisfactory night, or (2) Oh God, is this about to be a bit difficult?
All of which I've thought before, and tended to assume that Peter is intending to be sympathetic if abstracted. What I haven't thought about before is the implication of Bunter potentially taking it seriously as a dismissal. It certainly makes Peter's laughing about the morning's Humorous Soot/Sink Incident an awful lot harsher from Bunter's POV, and adds greater force to his being off-kilter over the next few days and the absolute triumph when he beats Harriet to be the one wanted once again. No wonder the Duchess wonders how things are going after talking to him.
***
And yet people still think that Bunter fantasises about racehorses. Well, I suppose they have big noses and are famously well-endowed. (Do you think I'd get away on the Yahoo list with "Bunter has a dirty night out in the Denver stables" on the grounds that it if you don't accept anything at all is going on re. Peter then something must be going on re. Equus caballus?)
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Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 01:44 pm (UTC)It makes Peter telling Harriet to ask Bunter about lunch and then congratulate him when it turns out he's already organised it all seem even more of an attempt at smoothing the way for all three of them. Though it is Harriet who brings up the question of Bunter in the first place. She's been worried about what Bunter would feel about it all since two days after the engagement. Has Peter only just thought about it?
As to "following the cherished creature every step of the way", apart from writing to his mother to take his mind off it, Bunter has also found and booked a chimney sweep, sourced the makings of breakfast (or did they bring their own eggs) and arranged for the delivery of the papers by a convoluted process all by eight o'clock in the morning. Did he go out for a long walk the instant he woke up and meet half the village? He's either trying desperately to prove he's indispensable or he's sublimating something. Or just trying to keep occupied until they bloody get out of bed.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 02:24 pm (UTC)Harriet - at this point, as opposed to with the DD - is asking about procedures a bit here, I think. She's never lived with personal servants in the same way as Peter, even assuming that her childhood home involved a maid and a cook, Bunter is still different, being Peter's manservant-acting-as-general-factotum. So she's not wanting to tread on his toes here professionally as much as personally, in a rather odd situation. We know that Peter's thought about it in general, in that the DD recruits the London servants, but there doesn't really seem to be much of suggestion that he has thought about how Harriet and Peter will cope with each other personally until the Moment Arrives. Which is the benefit of his position, in that he hasn't had to whilst B and H both separately have.
Or just trying to keep occupied until they bloody get out of bed.
Re. the early morning, you forget finding the fire-dogs in the coal house, pumping up the cistern, and putting the oil stove in order. Given the ill-soundproofed ceiling, perhaps he was looking for outdoor jobs to do. He sources eggs and bacon from the visiting baker. (My God! Eight o'clock. Allowing for Peter arriving upstairs at c. 12:30am, and hoping that the "night's proceedings" - at each end of the night - involve a bit of foreplay, how much sleep have they not got?)
I look forward to the outcome of the nefarious purposes of your own. I think there's quite a bit of Bunter POV tucked away in the text, but it lurks in the middle of things and is easily missable. And it still often doesn't say exactly what he's thinking.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 04:37 pm (UTC)But Peter could have said "Oh, Bunter just gets on with things, don't worry about it" rather than specifically telling her to compliment him on his organisational skills (I was going to say 'butter him up a bit' but there are too many filthy minds about). It does look as though he is trying to um... ease things along for the Harriet-Bunter side of the triangle that he's only just thought of.
And yes, now I look, conversations with the baker and the milkman account for most of the logistics so Bunter didn't have to go outside the house. But if the bacon isn't being fried until 8, how early is he talking to the baker or the earlier milkman? And how much earlier than that does Harriet wake up/is woken up by Bunter moving furniture about? You are quite right, it's not love or vicarage sherry, it's sleep deprivation.
And I am going to have to read the whole canon again, I can see.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 07:49 pm (UTC)And I am going to have to read the whole canon again, I can see.
There are worse fates.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 04:56 pm (UTC)I'm not so sure about that. I think working miracles comes naturally to Bunter, and no further explanation is needed than that miracles needed to be worked, so he did. After all, In Clouds of Witness he not only held Peter's weight in the mud for half the night, he also managed to get up early in the morning to clean and press his clothes afterwards, and to make sure there was breakfast.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-21 10:24 am (UTC)If I keep talking about it, I will have to write it. I do have about 12 hours thinking time on trains this weekend.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-21 12:11 pm (UTC)*rubs hands in anticipation*
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-21 12:13 pm (UTC)Yes, but this is magic fandom angst mud, in which the weight is only the weight of their Manly Pain.
I must get mud into the Angsty Fic of Doom. Maybe Peter can stare at the vegetable patch in fear and loathing.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-26 08:42 am (UTC)I did start a prequel to Fear and Loathing in the Vegetable Patch, aka Mud, Mud, Glorious Mud, but I've got stuck :-(
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-26 10:02 am (UTC)Can you not gird yourself and leap free in one mighty bound, leaving your wellies behind you?
And tell more!
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-26 11:20 am (UTC)I have done the angsty mud bit, and that works quite well (insofar as one can ever tell these things) but the plot is proving a real bugger.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-26 02:41 pm (UTC)Very frustrating. To coin a phrase, What Would Dorothy Do? If Bunter - as opposed to the reader - has to know, could he just guess? A leak from a superior officer and he puts two and two together?
I seem to be jotting down notes for Bunter/Gherkins (not, I stress, the vegetable, oh God am I now going to have to write a spoof along those lines) instead of getting on with writing a lengthy report that is a lot less fun. It must be the floppy-haired public school types playing croquet in the garden distracting me.
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-27 03:35 am (UTC)Dorothy very sensibly limited herself to dropping a few hints! It's an amazingly effective technique and I have Taken Note.
Bunter doesn't actually have to know, just the reader - I did try writing earlier scenes but it all got a bit saggy and out of hand, so I think it has to be a vignette and adhere to the Unities. And I suppose I could leave the plot as Hints myself, but it seems like cheating, somehow.
I am greatly looking forward to Bunter Enjoys Pickled Gherkins (though I should have thought floppy-haired public school types playing croquet would be inspirational rather than otherwise).
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-27 12:04 pm (UTC)Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-27 12:17 pm (UTC)The floppy-haired ones are inspirational as far as Sayers goes, but not, alas, the financial situation of the Theology Faculty.
Bunter Enjoys Pickled Gherkins
His mouth closed around the glistening length, savouring its taste...
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-27 01:54 pm (UTC)ROTFL! But really, with the Theology faculty, surely one has a right to Divine Inspiration?
His mouth closed around the glistening length, savouring its taste...
Oh, YUCK!!!
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-27 03:33 pm (UTC)I'd sign a deal with the devil to have the thing finished in the next half hour.
Be grateful I couldn't be bothered to write a whole scene of gherkin badfic ;-)
Re: Busman's menage a trois
Date: 2010-04-20 04:58 pm (UTC)Hooray!