nineveh_uk

One of my favourites is The Lives of Others, which should definitely be given an American remake, because let's be honest, it's kind of inaccessible at the moment. For a start they should cut all that crap about art. And the hero should write screenplays, not theatre plays, because what kind of danger to the state could theatre possibly be? And the turning point when the Stasi villain realises he can't go on like this has to go - who the hell wants to watch a guy cry silently while he listens to a symphony, for chrissake? And not even a good symphony, like maybe Beethoven, something you recognise from an aftershave commerical. It would be so much more powerful if he breaks down listening to the hero give a speech about the importance of freedom and how you can never break the human spirit. And at the end he and the hero should embrace and there should be a heart-warming speech about how much they owe each other. Oh, and can we do something about the background? Because all those dull blues and greens and fugly apartments get really tedious to watch. Also, it would be way better if the villains wore Nazi unforms. I mean, Nazi, Stasi, what's the difference, except for the snazzier uniforms and the cool deaths heads?

Maybe this time it would win an oscar. I mean a real oscar, not a crap little "Foreign Film" oscar.