The hashtag has yet to be finalised

[nineveh_uk]

#ballgate #sandpapergate #balltampering ? All I know is that I'm putting off the housework in order to watch HD closeups of a man shoving sandpaper down his underpants. The Schadenfreude is strong with this one. Full marks to the camera team for being alert.

(Explanation: the Australian cricket team have been caught ball tampering. To be precise they have been caught in clearly premeditated sandpapering (home-made with sticky tape) of the ball and then attempting to cover it up. The senior players were all in on it, and it looks from the footage as if the coach may have known what was going on, too. They apologised and hoped it would go away, giving as their justification that it was such an important match for them to win. It has not gone away. The humour in this disgraceful situation comes from the undeniable exposure of Cricket Australia's brand of hypocrisy, which has been on display in this series against South Africa, such as their habit of hurling personal abuse at other players and then whinging massively if they get any back, and it is very easy to imagine how they would have reacted as a team to an offence of considerably less magnitude than this one. They are the epitome of a team that dishes it out and can't take it. Or to put it more simply, cheating bullies. But the merely sordid is raised to the sublime by the hugely unsubtle way they attempted to cover this incident up, involving walkie talkies, the twelfth man, and underpants. My tip to all sports people: when you are caught cheating live on camera then trying to hide the evidence in your jockstrap is not going to help.)

Meanwhile the England men continue to underperform in New Zealand (previously sneered at by Australia for playing politely, apparently the greatest sin), but the women are doing nicely in India.

Comments

[ankaret]

I don't normally follow cricket but 'Unfortunately I was in the wrong place at the wrong time' is not an explanation for why you were carrying sandpaper about in your pants.

[nineveh_uk]

Not least because it raises the question as to what is the right place and the right time to carry sandpaper in your pants.

[ankaret]

Expecting to meet Donald Trump and his wandering hands?

[lilliburlero]

Walkie-talkies, The Twelfth Man, and Underpants has to be the name of the movie...

[nineveh_uk]

An Oscar winner for sure!

[tree_and_leaf]

The schadenfreude is indeed strong!

[nineveh_uk]

Oh yes. I would rather they hadn't done it, but since they have I am glad that it is providing such a rich vein of entertainment at their expense.

[sgac]

This is getting blanket coverage here in Australia. There are tv segments about how parents should to explain to their cricket-loving kids what happened. Fortunately I am not emotionally involved.

[nineveh_uk]

There's been quite a bit of coverage of the Australian coverage here, it does look very dramatic!

[ylla.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure I would know what was going on even if I knew what was going on, if you see what I mean (how can it possibly help to have sandpaper in your pants?), but it does all sound excitingly scandalous!

[nineveh-uk.livejournal.com]

It can help to have sandpaper in your pants if you weren't supposed to have it in your pocket. Though since this isn't primary school in 1952 I am not sure that umpires can actually say "turn out your pockets" in the middle of the field.

[ylla.livejournal.com]

Oh, I see - yes, I suppose that explains that side of it! And phlebas has explained to me why it would help to have sandpaper at all, although it all still sounds to me like much harder work than just concentrating on bowling well in the first place...